


A Ghost of a Touch

by kirsctein



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Alternate Universe, Domestic, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-09-25
Updated: 2015-09-25
Packaged: 2018-04-23 09:23:27
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,168
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4871500
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kirsctein/pseuds/kirsctein
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sometimes, not even the strongest kind of love will let you hold close the one you care about the most.</p>
            </blockquote>





	A Ghost of a Touch

**Author's Note:**

> Well then I suggest that you listen to [this playlist](https://open.spotify.com/user/lostechelon/playlist/6myqE3saLf2MAISuWBTURD) while reading, or at least look up One Ok Rock's song "Good Goodbye" from youtube or smth because that was what gave me the inspiration....But yeah.

Koushi was watching Daichi sleep. He looked so peaceful, hugging his pillow and legs curled up against his chest. He looked so small. The pale early-morning sun was sneaking in tiny rays from between the blinds, making the dust dance in the light, and making light and shadow play beautifully on Daichi’s face and hair. Koushi smiled a gentle smile, a smile that always made Daichi reach for his face in amazement. Koushi lifted his hand on his cheek, closing his eyes on the memory of his beloved’s touch.

Daichi made a small noise that made Koushi open his eyes. It had sounded like a sob. Daichi’s lips were quivering and he was hugging his pillow tighter now – as Koushi watched, a small tear escaped from between his eyelids that were tightly pressed close. Koushi then made a distressed noise himself, reaching towards Daichi, placing his hand on the other man’s shoulder.

“Shhhh, it’s okay” he said, and moved his hand to stroke Daichi’s hair. “It’s okay.”

Daichi curled up even smaller, but his face relaxed a bit. Koushi lowered himself on the bed, leaning on his elbow. He kept stroking Daichi’s hair until the other seemed to really relax and let go of the bad dream he was having. Koushi smiled a little, and placed a kiss near Daichi’s ear.

“Only good dreams for you” he whispered, letting himself drop on the mattress, nesting his face on the back of Daichi’s neck, his other arm around Daichi and other pressed palm against his sturdy back. He smiled contently, letting out a sigh. “Let’s sleep a little longer, shall we?” 

And so they did.

*

Daichi was pulling his shirt on in a hurry. Koushi was watching him from the couch, letting out a small giggle when he noticed that the buttons were in the wrong holes, and a louder one when Daichi noticed his error and had to unbutton and re-button his shirt again in frustration. Daichi stormed into the bedroom, and soon came back into the living room now fully dressed in a suit and a briefcase on hand. 

“Keys, keys….” he was muttering, looking around.

“On the kitchen counter” Koushi smiled at him.

“Ah!” Daichi barked, victorious. Koushi lifted his legs on the sofa and hugged them, smiling while following Daichi’s movements, small wrinkles forming around his eyes. Daichi grabbed the keys, stuffing them in his pocket. He put on his shoes, grabbed his coat and opened the door. 

“I’ll be going then” he said with a small voice.

“Be back safe” Koushi replied from the sofa, hugging his legs tighter.

*

There was a sound of footsteps behind the door, and Koushi stood up from his place on the couch, moving towards the door. As he stepped into the corridor, the door opened and Daichi stepped in.

“I’m home” Daichi whispered as he took off his shoes and placed his briefcase on the floor next to them.

“Welcome back” Koushi said, and touched Daichi’s arm briefly as he hang his overcoat on the rack and then walked past him, deeper inside the apartment. Koushi followed him in, shaking his head as Daichi just dropped his coat and tie on the floor as he kept walking. He clicked his tongue, making a tsc-sound, but a warm smile never really leaving his face. He should’ve taught his beloved some manners.

Daichi’s steps got slower and heavier as they made their way towards the heart of the apartment. They walked into the living room, and Daichi came into a stop in the middle of the room. Koushi moved past him, so that he could see his face. He noticed how Daichi’s face was twisted into a scowl, his brow furrowed and the corners of his mouth turned downward. He reached towards Daichi again, gently placing his hand on his arm, his smile now sad too. 

Daichi let out a sigh and took a step towards the shrine in the corner of the room. He kneeled in front of the small shrine, lit the incense and put it on the holder next to the photoframe. He put his hands together for a prayer, bowing his head and closing his eyes. Koushi sat down next to him, watching him with his head slightly tilted to the side.

“Today was rough” Daichi said silently, eyes still closed and hands in prayer. “So many things keep reminding me of you. The flower shop on the corner, the café next to the train station… The smell of coffee, the pen you gave me, which I use at work… So many things.” He furrowed his brow more, and Koushi wanted to reach to stroke the frown away. But he just sat there, hands pressed into fists on his thighs, smiling sadly.

After sitting in the silence for a moment, Daichi’s shoulders started to shake slightly, and a tear rolled down his face. He let out a small, miserable sob.

“I miss you so much” Daichi whispered, his voice hoarse and full of sadness. “Not a day goes by that I don’t think about you…No, not an hour goes pass that I don’t. I keep dreaming about the good times, all the trips we did together, all the days we spent just lying on the bed, talking…” 

Violent sobs were shaking his whole body now, tears flowing down his face. Koushi inched closer, wrapping his arms around the love of his life, resting his head against Daichi’s shoulder. 

“I miss you so much” Daichi choked out, his voice breaking. He arched forward, dropping his forehead against the tatami. Koushi followed his movements, without letting go. He stroked Daichi’s hair, murmuring soft words into his ear. Koushi was crying too, his tears silent in contrast of Daichi’s rough and heartbreaking wailing. Daichi took a shaking breath, a strangled noise escaping his mouth. He pressed his hands on his eyes, as if he could stop the tears by doing that.

It hurt Koushi to see Daichi like this, it hurt him so so much. All he wanted to do was take away his sadness, his hurting… But all he could do right now was to hug him. Or, to be exact, even that wasn’t something he could actually do.

 

“I miss you so much, Koushi.”

Koushi let out an audible sob. Not audible for Daichi’s ears though. Koushi was still clinging to Daichi with his arms around him, arms that were only shadows, arms that couldn’t truly embrace his beloved anymore – arms that would just go through Daichi if he didn’t focus enough. Tears were streaming down his face, disappearing the moment they fell off of his face. This was so wrong, so excruciating, so…unfair. 

“I'm still right here, Daichi.”

The smoke slowly drifted towards the ceiling while the incense kept burning next to the photo of a young, gray-haired man, who always wore the biggest and brightest smile, and who would never truly get to embrace his beloved anymore.

“I love you so so much.”

**Author's Note:**

> I'm so sorry


End file.
